Men And The City

I just got off the phone with one of my best friends (who would kill me if I put his name here, so let’s just call him Jack).? See, Jack is a friend of mine from college.? He, Trish and I were like the three musketeers back then.? To make a long story short, Jack’s currently in pursuit of this girl who lived in Africa.? Me and Trish have been pretty sure she has no interest in him, but Jack kept going after her.? And today she got back from Africa… and sent him an e-mail.

Jack:? “I’m telling you, she’s all flirty with me.? Check this out… she said ‘Do you know where to get good cocktails in town?’? Is that an invitation or what?”
Me: ? “That’s a question.”
Jack:? “Okay, why would she ask me out of all people, where the best cocktail bar is?”
Me:? “Because she doesn’t know anybody in town?”
Jack:? “But she grew up here!”
Me:? “And left to Africa when she was like 8?”
Jack:? “Well the city hasn’t changed much!”
Me:? “Okay, this will never end.? Just e-mail her back.? Say ‘I do know one.? Want me to take you?’.? Now that’s flirty”

Silence.

Jack:? “Okay, sent.”
Me:? “You know, you have to play a little bit hard to get with her, dude.”
Jack:? “She already lived in Africa.? How harder can that be?”
Me:? “I really wish Trish is here right now to listen to us.? She’ll have instant labor.”
Jack:? “She replied!? She said: ‘Sure if you don’t mind Ben tagging along’.? Who the F is Ben?”
Me:? “Ben is the confirmation of my statement that she was asking a question to you and not flirting with you.”
Jack:? “Great, now what should I do?? Just go and engage in a mental threesome?”
Me:? “Jack, honey, it’s gonna be only a mental twosome.? You’re only their chauffeur.”
Jack:? “It’s all your fault!”
Me:? “Okay.”
Jack:? “What? Just okay?? Come on, what should I do?”
Me:? “Go.? It’s rude to offer yourself and backing off at the last minute.”
Jack:? “I suppose you’re waiting for the complete story tonight.”
Me:? “You bet.? I might even invite Trish over and make popcorns.? And Mr. BF would just love to see the ‘in love’ version of you.”
Jack:? “Evil bunch.”

To all men who says women are dumbified by SJP & co., just admit it: Men are a wee bit like women when they’re having crushes.? I’m gonna call Trish now and tell her all about this.? She’ll laugh like mad.

June 05 2008 04:01 pm | Funny